Single Lady Freestyle

Henrik Hoeg on Peel Street Poetry Annual Slam 2018:
The 13th anniversary of Peel Street Poetry, the largest English language open mic poetry night in Hong Kong, brought another night of celebration and verse capped off with the annual slam competition. As happens each year, groups of competitors were given a prompt and only 10 minutes to write a poem in response to that prompt. They battled in groups of five, and one person from each group was selected to go through to the final. The poems published here are from the five finalists, either from their first round or from the final in which the prompt was ‘replicate’. This year the judging panel was comprised of last year’s winner Denis Tsoi, the former director of the Hong Kong International Literary Festival Phillipa Milne, and Peel Street Poetry organisers and Cha contributors Akin Jeje and Henrik Hoeg. Jesamine Dyus’s “Single Lady Freestyle”, featured below, is one of a Finalist of 2018’s Peel Street Poetry Annual Slam.

SINGLE LADY FREESTLYE
by Jesamine Dyus

In the serious business of attracting mates,
One must, at times, surrender to the fates.
If only I weren’t so angsty and mad,
And the weather wasn’t too cold to dress scantily clad.
If only I could cook myself into a tasty dish-
To bait thirsty predators with a catfish.
Because it seems to exist as a single woman is to violate some primordial role-
Of pleasing men on earth, endangering others with my incomplete soul.
Because if you cry in the shower then no one can hear you,
You save more time and waste less tissue.
But it’s true, I’m an optimist, I don’t carry umbrellas,
And when I sing to my dog, yeah I feel like Cinderella.
But this Virgo booty is no damsel in distress,
Fail a thousand times before landing on success.
Not what I ordered, but I guess I will try it,
Nice, yeah you’re sweet, but I don’t take sugar in my diet.
And I think I need to book a chiropractor appointment,
My back is hunched from shouldering the cosmic disappointment-
Of knowing that some men grow into the men they were destined to be,
While others peak in high school, a terrible tragedy.
And he is 10% better than the person he was last year,
But 10% of nothing is still nothing, I fear.
Because rubbish belongs in the rubbish bin,
And in the sea of men, a lady must sink or swim.
So many fish in the sea, far and near,
If I lie perfectly still, Cupid can shoot me right here.

❀❀❀ Jesamine Dyus: As a woman who has been single since the dawn of time, I am faced with a choice: to sink in a puddle of my own self-pity or swim against the currents of scorn and unsolicited advice monologues. I choose to swim. ❀❀❀

Jesamine Dyus is a hip hop hobbyist and spoken word poet. She was a finalist of the Peel Street Poetry Slam Contest 2018. She works in hospitality in Hong Kong and was previously an English teacher and dance coach. She graduated from Brown University (Class of 2016), where she served on culture groups and dance teams. One day, when she is a middle-aged woman who wants to improve herself and enjoys listening to intimate confessions and emotional stories, she will grow a garden with lots of shade.

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